Heart songs

My niece Abby, age 1, at the old upright piano
So... once upon a time I started writing songs about Jesus and how He was speaking to me in His Word, and then I couldn't stop.

I was home for a few months between graduating from uni and starting my first ministry commitment, and I was waiting on God in the scary and stressful support-raising season, and though I hardly know the names of the notes, my fingers began to memorize the keys on my parents' old upright piano in the dining room. I spent hours scribbling scripture which came to mind and adding lyrics to it and God spent hours with me, ministering to my soul in the music coming out of it. It was intense! 

And even though I feel a bit silly for it, I want to share them with you here because He's still ministering to me through the truth of His word in them and the raw way my heart came out on the page and in my voice. Maybe He'll also speak to you in them. And that makes the months of song-writing frenzy entirely worth it. 

(The titles are linked to the very novice youtube videos. Just click through.)

The song that started it all.
I was struggling very much my last year of uni in England. One night I couldn't sleep, and when it came nearly time for the sun to rise, I wrapped myself in a blanket and went to sit on the roof and watch it. And God spoke to me such hope in that sunrise, and inspired this song.

 Romans 8:35-39--
"Can anything ever separate us from Christ's love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted , or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?.... No, despite all these things , overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow-- not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below-- indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."

This song got me into loads of hot water when I was asked to perform it in church (I don't even know HOW to play the piano for real!!) and then at a women's retreat, and then asked to put it on a CD for people who had heard it! But it was a lesson God was trying to drive home to my heart. And apparently a lesson others needed to hear too.

This song is basically saying all the things from God's heart that I was needing to remind myself of, and singing them out in case others needed it too. Again, the truth of His unconditional love was washing over me all anew, spoken to me especially powerfully in Song of Songs 4:7, "All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you" and in Isaiah 49:16, "See, I have engraved you on the palm of my hands..." and in Ephesians 1:4-6: "For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as His Sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will-- to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given us in the One He loves."

"But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you. O Israel, the one who formed you says,
Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.
For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

But you are my witnesses, O Israel! says the Lord. You are my servant.
You have been chosen to know me, believe in me, and understand that I alone am God.
There is no other God— there never has been, and there never will be.
  I, yes I, am the Lord, and there is no other Savior.
  First I predicted your rescue, then I saved you and proclaimed it to the world.
No foreign god has ever done this. You are witnesses that I am the only God, says the Lord.
From eternity to eternity I am God. No one can snatch anyone out of my hand. No one can undo what I have done." --Isaiah 43:1-3, 10-13

These are some of my favourite verses in all of Scripture, and I needed to hear their truth.

I was in a season of waiting on God for EVERYTHING. In between moving countries to go and serve Him, and having no strength or power or money or wisdom of my own in which to do it in! This song was my sort of prayer... borrowing from scriptures like Zephaniah 3:17 and John 8:32.

"For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again." -- 2 Cor 5:14-15

"For 'Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.' But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent?" -- Rom 10:13-15

Because my heart was so tugged toward this life of missionary work and ministry and it was a lonely way to be as I was preparing to leave home and go off on my own chasing this wild God and I found these verses comforting because they explained why my heart was so compelled.

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